The body alphabet.

This should make you smile!

New Alphabet :

A is for apple, and B is for boat, that used to be right, but now it won't float!

Age before beauty is what we once said, but let's be a bit more realistic instead.

Now The
Alphabet:

A's for arthritis;

B's the bad back,

C's the chest pains, perhaps car-di-ac?

D is for dental decay and decline,

E is for eyesight, can't read that top line! 

F is for fissures and fluid retention,

G is for gas which I'd rather not mention.

H for high blood pressure -- I'd rather it low;

I for incisions with scars you can show. 

J is for joints out of socket, won't  mend,

K is  for knees that crack when they bend.

L's  for libido, what happened to sex? 

M is for memory, I forget what comes next.

N is neuralgia, in nerves way down low.  

O is for osteo, bones that don't grow!

P for prescriptions, I have quite a few, just give me a pill and I'll be good as new!  

Q is for queasy, is it fatal or flu?  

R is for reflux, one meal turns to two.

S is for sleepless nights, counting my fears. 

T is for Tinnitus; bells in my ears! 

U is for urinary; troubles with flow; 

V for vertigo, that's 'dizzy,' you know.

W for worry, now what's going 'round?  

X is for X ray, and what might be found.

Y for another year I'm left here behind,  

Z is for zest I still have in my mind!

I've survived all the symptoms, my body's deployed, and I'm keeping twenty-six doctors fully employed!